I hope it's not just me, but other people out there who just doesn't want to know about other people's problems. I'm not talking about documentaries or reality shows, I actually likes them.
I'm talking about problems your friends share with you. Particularly your spouse, bf/gf.
It's like they expect you to care. Which in fact, you don't, or can't.
For example, your gf's mom is being a bitch. And she complains to you on every bitchmove her mom makes. Is it supposed to be a request to talk to her mom? Am I supposed to be angry?
See, most of you likes to rant. Me too, but I don't, and you do. Why? Because you don't understand how frustrating it is to listen. Maybe because no one tells you their problems, or maybe it's just you ranting all the time and not listening. Most of the time the listener get frustrated because they can't do anything to fix your problems, or maybe its not that big of a deal to even do anything.
'My mom ignores me all the time. It's so annoying!' How the fuck am I supposed to help?
And its accumulative. Day 1, you complain about your parents. Day 2 you complain about work. Day 3 about colleagues. Day 4, boss. By day 10 I am already annoyed. Once you say anything, I already know where its going. Its going to the
'little things that doesn't involve me but makes us quarrel' box. And you make it sounds like the whole world is against you. Sometimes I start to wonder if you're the bad person and I'm the only one who was smited.
I am a very selfish person. If I don't even have enough energy to run away from my problems, I don't want to hear yours. I get angry because I care (maybe you won't believe by now). I get angry because I feel bad about what you're going through and I can't help it. I don't really know why I get irritated.
Now you're telling me your friend's problem? Don't tell me you're just looking for an listening ear. Because when I say its not
our problem (I actually meant 'my problem' but doesn't want to sound like an asshole), you got mad. Are you implying I should give all my money to your friend for her grandfather's surgery?
What I'm trying to say is, its okay to rant. But don't get sad or mad if the listener tells you its not their problem. They are not obliged to help you unless you ask for help anyway.
How will you feel if I say these to you?
My mom doesn't have enough money to pay for my school fees and she going around borrowing from relatives.
My boss is kind to me but sometimes when she's mad at something, she always expect me to fix it for her. It's like I'm just her tool.
My parents are getting old yet they are still working. I don't even think they have any saving left. And my brother is getting worried so he's being a dick about it.
Just so you know, you always ruin days with these. I pretend nothing happen and text you next morning. One day I may go ALL CAPS RAGE about it.
And you wonder why I don't text you often.